

I steal another five minutes in bed after they leave because I can identify every squeak, clink, clank, scuffle and kerfuffle that they can possibly make around the house. It’s totally worth it, but they eventually get antsy and want to play (what’s wrong with these creatures?). I trained my kids to hang out in bed with me, watching their morning shows with sippy cups of milk, so that I could close my eyes in two-minute spurts between their various interruptions. You will develop a keen sense of hearing to track your kids’ movements in the house while you lie in bed. Whether money is tight in your house or you’re flush with cash, the best present - the only present - that holds any value is the opportunity to lay in bed undisturbed until you choose to get up on your own terms.

You will request “sleeping in” as your gift for any special occasion. Conversely, when they wake up earlier than expected, you will feel a betrayal akin to Caesar’s and will convince yourself that there is a conspiracy in the works. This delightful surprise, even if it’s only a few extra minutes, gives you a head start on your slow and painful wake-up process, and this is as precious a gift as your children can ever give you. You will love your kids a little more on the days they sleep in. Whether you’re home all of the time with your kids or only have the weekends to indulge in slower mornings, here’s what you need to know to survive the early days with early birds.

Our fellow parents who hop out of bed without a second thought will not understand the plight of us night owls, but that makes the struggle no less real. They’ll have the audacity to ask for things like breakfast, milk and a diaper change before the clock strikes double digits, and it will almost be too much to bear. All I have to offer you is the truth - that you will still lament the dawn of morning, but, having no other choice, you will begrudgingly get out of bed, bleary eyed and yawning, to tend to your chipper cherubs. All of the coffee in the world or clever breakfast hacks prepped the night before won’t change the fact that you’d rather be in bed.
#Morning person night owl meme how to
I’m going stop you right here if you’re looking for practical advice on how to manage mornings with early risers when you, yourself, are not a morning person.
